One of the reasons why today’s relationships were not sparkling and blossoming as expected is because they were not established on common interests.” – Potentiality Builders


As we are heading towards the end of another calendar year, it is important for us to reflect on what we have done in the past and recommend what we can do to strengthens and bolsters mutual interest, understanding and cooperation in whatever engagement we find ourselves.

It is imperative for us to note this because there is no life that is self-sufficient; no life can be lived apart and alone, and because it is believed that someone’s network is his/her net worth are obvious justifications that what shapes our lives are reciprocation of what we have dropped into other people’s lives. Hence, we are meant to value the people around us.

We have to be seeing ourselves as repositories of assets, appreciate ourselves and always endeavour to harness the qualities we can collectively bring to table to ensure we achieve our objectives as we relate with ourselves. To be doing, people have to identify their identities and always ready to be accountable to their personalities.

Even in a formal setting where authority always interfere in how we relate, we can still value the people around us without our authority being trampled on. Potentiality Builders opines that: “The strength of any leader is his ability to know his followers and identify their needs; and how he respects the audacity of authority that accompanies his office reflects his personality.”

It is crass misunderstanding of the notion above that has led to the crash of many people. Their obsessions with little respect people reserved for them have overwhelmed them. They don’t discern that when a man is about to perish; he will be robed with pride, and he would be overwhelmed by only the good things without acknowledging his flaws that people have overlooked.

In order not to fall to that same trap, we have made the following suggestions on how to value the people around us and what we can be doing to show that we value them.

Respect Yourself: You are the one to determine what you want people to give to you. Some people have misplaced being jovial and approachable to being foolish, stupid and naughty. Also, because you want people to respect you should not breed the spirit of pride in you. When you respects yourself, you will always find a means of striking balance between relating with people humanely and also carving bounds for them, which will make sensible individuals understand you for whom you are.

Know That We All Have Our Flaws: No one is perfect because it is only the Supreme Being that has the attribute of perfection. Understanding this would enable us to know that we all have our traits and characters that may not be acceptable to others. But because we are not to dwell on our weaknesses, we have to concentrate on how to tap from our strengths and achieve our goals.

Show That You Have Interest in Them: People find it easy to go to people that are interested in them than those that don’t possess such quality. Aside that, we see them as those we can easily approach and confide in. No matter what, if you value people around you, you will be fervently engaged with them, give them attention and this will propel them to be reposing their confidence in you.

Know What They Value: The people around you will always have something they prioritized that they always give their utmost attention to – that’s what they value. By knowing what they value, it will be easier for you to drive them by giving them what they want in alignment to their values.

Demonstrates Empathy: This is one of the most important qualities that should be possessed by anyone that wants to survive and thrive in this century. By demonstrating empathy, you will be relating with people with high sense of courteousness by respecting their beliefs, points of view and impression without infringing theirs and not allowing them to infringe yours.

Communicate Efficiently And Effectively: People tend to relate with those that can communicate with them easily. Adoption of right words or signals with the right medium to pass messages across to others is vital to sustaining mutual interaction. People that finds it difficult to strike chord in people within a short period will find it difficult to hold them on their feet till the delivery of their message.

Be a Source of Inspiration to Them: The amalgam of the previous attributes is enough to make people sees you as a source of inspiration to them, because when they are with you, they feel relaxed, confident and poise as your acts, deeds and words will be sparking their thinking. What you say and do to them count a lot in flaming their mental strength and let them discover their self-worth.

Above all, for you to value people around you, you have to be witty, persuasive and compelling; and you have to be adept in pondering on these skills so that you can easily demarcate between confidence and pride. Someone once admonishes us to be respecting people for their aspirations and desires; not based on our perceived impressions. Remember, whom you value, you respects. What you respects, you protects.


Sulyman Sodeeq Abdulakeem
writer and co-author of the book “Responsible Living: Live to Fulfill Your Potential.