What should I do after I have failed?
This is hard! I mean it is emotionally and societally hard to live again after failing. Sometimes, we get this feeling of something hanging right there in the throat, choking and squeezing the breath out of us. Our society hates failure and so there is no room for failures, neither is there a place to hide.
It is so annoying that despite all the efforts we put together, some of the pleasures we deprive ourselves just to be able to attain success, we still fail one way or the other. It is even more annoying when those who lucky succeed make jokes out of our pain. Sometimes, we are better than them, but just as I have mentioned earlier they were just lucky this time.
But does this make failure a sin? Something we cannot recover from, or to live with for the rest of life?
I have failed severally. And in most cases, I didn’t just fail myself. I failed those who believe in my strength and capacity. I have failed in academics, I have failed behaviorally, I have failed in sports, and I have failed as a friend, as a family member, as a mentor, as a boss, among other areas of responsibility.
Believe me, failing or failure isn’t news to me anymore. But this does not mean that I don’t get headache when I hear or see that I have failed. Even when I set personal goals that I couldn’t achieve them, I get weaken and so disappointed at me.
Funny enough, I have lived out each and all the failures I have ever had in my past. Most times I don’t really have anyone to motivate me out of my depression, I only get people who feel I could have done better, and they are all disappointed in me. Often all I have after every failure is I and I. so I talk myself through and out of that failure each time I encounter it.
So what should I do after I might have failed?
First, you have to live for another day, a day to prove to the world that you are far better than whatsoever they have in mind about you. You cannot leave this world with someone having the impression that you are a failure. Though, people say first impression last forever. I think it is a misjudged statement. I believe only last impression last forever. You still have the grace to redeem yourself. Hence, what I am saying is that never think of suicide after any failure.
Second, understand that you are not the first to fail and you are never going to be the last at it. Also understand that failure is not absolute, it doesn’t define you. Don’t ever believe you are a failure and that you cannot ‘pass-out’ of failure. The number of times you might have failed notwithstanding, you can still succeed. You only need a new strategy. There was a reason or two why you had to fail, find out why and fight it.
Third, feel free to be you after any failure. Shout if you have to shout, cry as loud as you want to, box anything that wouldn’t cost you much but don’t you ever blame anyone or thing for your failure. There will always be reasons and factors that aided your failure, but always take full responsibility no matter how bitter it might taste.
Fifth, I will suggest that you don’t get angry at yourself for too long. Don’t hate yourself, or refuse to believe in yourself for too long. Don’t let your failure get into your bloodstream; don’t let it get into your head. Find time to celebrate your failed attempts and then find time to rethink or retrace your steps. You wouldn’t see clearly if you are still angry and all your facial muscles folded up. You won’t see neither if your eyes are in tears.
Lastly, always act fast. Never be too motivated to think it is okay to fail. Yes, it is okay to fail, but you are the only one thinking it is. Someone who succeeds doesn’t think it is. So rise up as fast as you can, and race for victory. Success doesn’t come to those who are motivated; it goes to those who are working hard to get it. Success loves someone who will always have time to nurture and protect it. Never settle for less.